Recently, I've been feeling like 'World's Worst Mom'. I keep expecting a trophy or some medal or with this horrid title... Perfect example, here it is, a Friday night, kid's first day of school was today.  The house is dark, quiet, and cold. Signs that a migraine in present. I am alone on the couch, as always. The kids are gone with their dad. Like always. *sigh*

 

What a thief, these headaches. My life consists of work and then the comfort of my dark quiet home. I very rarely ever venture out. Ever. Ever. My husband knows all the neighborhood kids. He knows their parents. He plays outside with our son and his friends. Rides bikes with him. Plays ball with him. sometimes, he'll pull up from work and a group of neighborhood kids come running up to greet him wanting to play with him! Me? Well, I can be found keeping the couch comfy gritting my teeth if they ring the doorbell because that ring stays in my head forever. *sigh*

 

I miss church pretty regularly - not the best example I'd like to set for my kids. Thankfully, my husband, the perfect dad, is always there to take them. Do I sound envious? I am, a little... But only because I wish I was more like him. I wish I felt like running around outside. Jumping on the trampoline. Riding a bike.

 

When I was "well" was I a more 'involved' mom? Hummm???

 

So anyway, I've been beating myself up. A lot. Not a hard thing for me to do. I've always been hard on myself about everything anyway. But then I realized that I might not be so bad after all.

 

Last weekend, I picked my daughter up from spending a week with my grandparents out of state in their retirement community. Everyone in their little community just raved about what wonderful manners my teenager has and how kind and helpful she is. I get compliments like that about my kids all the time, and I think that says something about how they are raised. Also, whenever my daughter, who is now 14, is going through a trial or trouble, or if someone she cares about is, she'll always find Bible scriptures for them. That is also something that I am proud of, and something that I have taught her.

 

As for my son, there are computer games that the two of us play together. I've taught him how to play silly games like 'Bejeweled' and 'Family Feud' and every night we play a game or two together, in the safety of the couch. We cuddle and watch movies together when I'm having particularly bad days. I make it a point to make a big deal when action movies like 'Batman' or 'Spiderman' come out.

 

When I do feel well, I know it's rare for us all, so I make the most of it by doing spontaneous things. Once I wore a fake HUGE mustache through Wal-Mart. I thought my family was going to pee on themselves they laughed so hard. Another time I just randomly started up a Nerf gun war with them. Or I've just woke up and decided we should go to the beach.

 

So... I may not be PERFECT... But I don't think I deserve that stupid medal after all. (;