Logically, I know that God did not give me a spirit of fear, and yet I feel so very afraid...
Sunday I had every intention of going to church, but the weather was bad. Well, even though the weather has NEVER bothered me before, and it's been much worse than Sunday, I stayed at home because I was scared. I wasn't scared that we'd get struck at church, or that power would go off, or anything half way rational. Instead, I was scared that we'd get in a car accident because it was so windy and my scar on the back of my head would pop open and my brains would spill out all over the road. Sorry to be so graphic, but that's honestly all I could think of. I nearly worked myself into a panic just thinking of how awful it would be to have a gapping hole in my head... again...
The doctor assured me that there was no chance of my scar ever "popping" open. Yet I won't ride a bike. I worry that I'll be hit by a car. I worry that I'll fall and land on the back of my head. Just crazy stuff!
So I pray that I won't feel afraid. I pray that fear won't cripple me. Yet sometimes, it does...
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