When His answer isn’t at all what we expected…

There have been times in my life, LOTS of times actually, that the answer to my prayers seemed to be a massively big resounding “NO”. When the brain tumor was first found, or even more recently when I’ve faced tummy troubles, I felt like maybe I was a crummy Christian. Here people had teamed up with me in droves to pray, and yet that miraculous healing, the one that we claimed and the one I believed in – never seemed to happen. However, 17 months after brain surgery, God did miraculously heal me, but for those 17 dark and long months I was left untouched…

So I felt like maybe I was a crummy Christian because I didn’t see that miracle. Maybe my faith was in a bad state? Maybe I just had too much sin stacked up against me? Whatever the case was, somehow I felt that I must have done something not to “earn” His touch…

I remember several months ago having a day of feeling really horrible, new test results looking grim, and enjoying my little pity party when suddenly God hit me with a thought. “Remember Gethsemane…” Frantically, I remember looking up Jesus’ last prayer in Gethsemane. Jesus didn’t want to die… In fact, He prayed if there was anyway possible for Him to avoid this end, let it be! But we all know the story, Jesus still ended up marching up to that cross to be crucified for you and for me. Did He get a “NO”???

Recently a friend has received an answer to a prayer that just seems all wrong. I’ve been reminded of all this above, and then I’ve also thought of something else. Of course we are accustomed to how long God seems to take sometimes. Poor Sarah! How long did she pray before God finally gave her the answer to her prayer??? Or Moses. How long did that man wonder before his people ever reached the promise land??? Look at Job! That poor man lost EVERYTHING before he ever saw restoration! Stories like that were comforting to me when I finally received that miraculous healing, but sometimes… well, sometimes our answer is still just a plain ol’ “NO”…

Apostle Paul is a perfect example. If there is someone that is definitely NOT a crummy Christian in my eyes – it’s Paul. I can’t see him lacking faith and any sins in his life were obviously outweighed by the grace and mercy of God. And yet the Bible records not one… not two… but three times that Paul prayed for something and do you know the answer he got back? “NO.”

That just erases all feelings of ownership that I’ve ever carried around because I’m not the only one that has heard a “No” before. And just because His answer can be “No”, doesn’t mean that I lack faith. Remember what the 3 Hebrew boys said before they were tossed into that fiery furnace?? I’ll paraphrase, but they said, “There is no way that we are bowing to any idol. We believe that our God CAN deliver us, but if He chooses not too – He is STILL God!”

And I can agree with that wholeheartedly. Maybe God doesn’t always answer the way I want Him too, but He is STILL God.